I feel like we cheated on our kids

Started by Jessica, May 28, 2012, 01:58:55 AM

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YouKnowWho

My kids are fine when we go out to eat and know that we often go to places they cannot eat.  They don't begrudge us that fact - even though DS1 is only 7.5, he has a clear knowledge of what I do to keep him safe at home, school and out and about (I am not kidding when I say he was born an old man). 

We have curtailed any thoughts about feeling bad about their allergies - we talk about what they can do.  Woe is me, imo will lead to risk taking. 

If any of my children had the nerve to be that disrespectful to me, it will be nipped in the bud.  The world will not change for you, you have to adapt to the world.  And if she thinks restaurants should close and no one close to her dare eat at them because she cannot, she is in for a very lonely world. 

DH and I have come to an understanding over the years in regards to my allergies, especially the drug allergies which have a longer half life than food.  I understand that Tylenol doesn't always cut it (it doesn't always do it for me either but the alternatives that work for me cause him to have strange side-effects so I cannot expect him to take those).  He knows he has to be honest about medications he is taking so as not to cause harm to me (post romantic relations and mad scratching are not ideal, let's just say). 

I know many spouses and significant others take that care as well.  It's a balance that I hope my own kids can strike in this world. 
DS1 - Wheat, rye, barley and egg
DS2 - peanuts
DD -  tree nuts, soy and sunflower
Me - bananas, eggplant, many drugs
Southeast USA

CMdeux

#16
Seconding what GN said about teens and emotional blackmail...


which is particularly ironic in a teen, like my DD, who really hasn't had a lifetime of classroom cupcakes, etc.  It's NEVER been "in your face" exclusion, so really, as a teen, if she lays a guilt trip on her dad and me for going to an Indian restaurant?  That's just being a bit spoiled.  Passive-aggressive, even.  Not that it's never happened, mind.  It's just that it's mostly about something other than food or exclusion.  If you KWIM. ;)

Resistance isn't futile.  It's voltage divided by current. 


Western U.S.

Mfamom

Quote from: CMdeux on July 23, 2012, 10:46:12 AM
Seconding what GN said about teens and emotional blackmail...


which is particularly ironic in a teen, like my DD, who really hasn't had a lifetime of classroom cupcakes, etc.  It's NEVER been "in your face" exclusion, so really, as a teen, if she lays a guilt trip on her dad and me for going to an Indian restaurant?  That's just being a bit spoiled.  Passive-aggressive, even.  Not that it's never happened, mind.  It's just that it's mostly about something other than food or exclusion.  If you KWIM. ;)

agree.  I wouldn't let my ds lay that guilt trip on me. 
When People Show You Who They Are, Believe Them.  The First Time.


Committee Member Hermes

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